


Of Love and Nightmares

by do_i_know_you



Category: Outer Banks (TV)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Boys In Love, Boys Kissing, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Insomnia, JJ (Outer Banks) Needs Love, JJ (Outer Banks) Needs a Hug, JJ's dad is a fucking dick, M/M, Nightmares, Short One Shot, jj has nightmares, john b is sleepdeprived, protective john b routledge, soft boyfriends
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-05
Updated: 2020-06-05
Packaged: 2021-03-04 01:35:25
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,592
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24555547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/do_i_know_you/pseuds/do_i_know_you
Summary: JJ's heart was still beating in his chest, tears running down his cheeks involuntary. His hair was sticking to his forehead with sweat, his eyes wildly searching the room as if to make sure it was safe. Once his gaze landed on the boy in front of him, JJ relaxed.“Hey, you’re okay, it wasn’t real.” But the thing is, it was. Maybe not now, but it’s not like his nightmares were about monsters or aliens or some other made up shit. His demons were real. “Can I touch you?” JJ only nodded, not yet finding his voice to answer...........JJ has nightmares, John B has insomnia - but it's okay as long as they have each other, too.
Relationships: JJ/John B. Routledge
Comments: 9
Kudos: 182





	Of Love and Nightmares

**Author's Note:**

> Just a short angsty one-shot with a fluffy ending. English isn't my first language, I'm sorry if there are any mistakes. Hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it!
> 
> If anybody has any request for future fics, feel free to leave them in the comments!

John B couldn’t sleep. But that wasn’t new. He hasn’t slept well since his dad went missing, now almost ten months ago. Sometimes it would help if JJ slept next to him, his presence calming him down and helping him take his mind off his worries, focusing rather on his boyfriend. 

But there were still bad nights, nights when even JJ couldn’t help. And right now, was one of those nights. John B was lying on his back, looking at the ceiling. He didn’t know how long he has been in that position, he only knew his eyes burned and his body was begging him to sleep, but he couldn’t. He hated nights like these. And ever since he and his friends started the treasure hunt for the Royal Merchant and the gold, they had become more and more frequent. He didn’t tell his friends or his boyfriend, even though it was quite obvious he wasn’t getting his eight hours of sleep. He was way crankier, got angry too quickly, lashing out on everybody for no reason. He even yelled at JJ. John B hated himself for it. JJ had been wanting to talk about it, but John B always brushed him off. It wasn’t like it was the first time he had trouble sleeping. But what JJ didn’t know was that he hasn’t slept a wink in over a week. 

The only light in the room was the moonlight peeking through the windows, casting light on the sleeping boy lying next to John B. He was sleeping on his stomach, his head lying on John B arm, which was wrapped around him. One of JJ’s arms was sprawled across John B’s chest. His hand was resting directly above John B’s heart, as if the feeling of it beating helped him sleep. John B turned his head to look at the boy snoring softly as he slept. It was hot in the room, even at night and their closeness didn’t help. The silver lighting reflected off of the beads of sweat on JJ’s back. John B’s vision has long ago adjusted to the darkness in the room, enabling him to see JJ’s split lip and the still healing bruise on his cheekbone. There were scratches, old and new, scattered along the golden skin of his torso. There was a purple bruise on his neck (it was still purple, even after days had passed since he got it), that scared John B the most. 

His heart sank, anger filling him as he thought about somebody hurting JJ. It was worse because it was his dad hurting him, the one person JJ should be able to trust, the one person who should love him unconditionally. John B hated Luke. He hated him more than he’s ever hated anybody in his life. JJ deserved the absolute world. That fucking pathetic excuse of a dad was beating him, making him think it was JJ’s fault, making him think he’s anything less than perfect. 

John B ran his hand across JJ’s swollen cheek gently, as he thought about how much he wanted to hurt Luke, how much he actually wants to kill him. He’d do anything for JJ to be safe and happy. But JJ didn’t want him to get involved. It was a subject that they had been fighting about ever since John B first found out about JJ’s dad. And they still do, way too often. JJ never wanted to tell anyone, sometimes even insisting it was all his fault anyway. That’s when John B’s heart broke the most, sometimes he’d almost cry before spending hours telling, showing JJ how far from the truth that is. Showing him how much love he deserved. 

JJ often had nightmares, mostly about his dad hurting him, sometimes about his mom leaving. It angered John B that Luke was hurting JJ, even in his dreams, haunting him every minute of the day. It was exactly the reason JJ spent most of his nights at the Château with John B, where he was safe and where John B could make sure nobody hurt him. Some nights when he did have to go home, John B had even more trouble falling asleep, thinking about what Luke might do to JJ, praying that he’s okay (even though he wasn’t really religious). 

Thinking about that, John B hugged the sleeping boy closer, as if his arms could keep him safe from the cruel world. He never wanted to let him go. 

His thoughts were interrupted when he felt JJ tensing up, his face scrunching up in discomfort. He grunted in his sleep, starting to trash around as if he wanted to get away from something, someone. John B’s hold on him withdrew, not wanting JJ to feel trapped. He placed a hand on his shoulder, lightly shaking it, trying to get him to open his eyes.

“JJ, wake up.”

But he didn’t, only started to trash around more. 

“Please, no, don’t…” JJ’s voice sounded so small and scared.

“It’s just a dream, love, wake up, it’s okay,” John B said a little louder as he started shaking his boyfriend with more force.

A few seconds later JJ finally stirred, slowly opening his eyes, confusion visible in the blue orbs as he sat up in bed. 

“Hey, it’s okay it was only a dream,” John B slowly extended his arms to touch the scared boy, being weary of any flinches. But JJ didn’t flinch, his vision finally focusing on his surroundings. His mind was racing, the dream felt so real. 

(But it wasn’t, you’re okay, you’re home, you’re safe.)

JJ's heart was still beating in his chest, tears running down his cheeks involuntary. His hair was sticking to his forehead with sweat, his eyes wildly searching the room as if to make sure it was safe. Once his gaze landed on the boy in front of him, JJ relaxed. 

“Hey, you’re okay, it wasn’t real.” But the thing is, it was. Maybe not now, but it’s not like his nightmares were about monsters or aliens or some other made up shit. His demons were real. “Can I touch you?” JJ only nodded, not yet finding his voice to answer. 

And then John B’s arms were wrapped around him, pulling him into a tight hug. JJ knew John B could feel him shaking slightly. Minutes passed before he calmed down enough to speak, “I’m sorry.”  
John B hated how broken he sounded.

“No, baby, no, don’t be sorry. It’s not your fault, okay?”

JJ didn’t answer him, just hugged him tighter and breathed in his scent. John B smelled of sea water, sunscreen and something else, something specific to only John B that calmed JJ’s racing heart.

“Want to talk about it?” John B asked as he gently started to run his fingers through JJ’s blond locks. He was met with silence, though. It didn’t happen often that JJ told him about his nightmares, but he could imagine what they were about. He didn’t want to push him, so he just continued to hold his boyfriend, pressing a kiss on his forehead every so often. 

Neither of them knew how long they stayed like that before JJ spoke up, “It was—It was about my dad.” He took a deep breath then continued, “He, um, he was choking me, like he did the other day,” John B’s heart broke, “but he didn’t—he didn’t stop. He just kept choking me and I—I, fuck…” 

He was starting to get worked up again, “Shhhh, you’re safe, I’m here, love.”

“He said it was my fault mom left.”

(That fucking piece of shit.)

John B promised himself he’s going to punch Luke the next time he sees him. Screw that, he’s going to beat him up till’ he can’t stand. He could feel JJ’s tears on the crook of his neck, where his head was resting.

“JJ-“

“Please don’t leave me, John B, please don’t leave me. Please…” JJ was now sobbing, his breathing hitched and uneven. The pleas left John B speechless. He would never ever leave JJ, he couldn’t. JJ was his whole world, without him he didn’t even know how to function. 

“Of course I’m not gonna leave you, JJ. Not ever. I’m right here, I’ll always be here.”

And silence filled the room again, the only sounds were those of JJ’s quiet sobs. John B started drawing soothing circles along the boy’s back, trying to calm him down best he could. 

“I love you, JJ. More than anything,” John B whispered after JJ’s sobs were reduced to mere sharp gulps of air, trying to regain control. 

In turn, the blond boy released a bitter-sweet chuckle, “I—I love you, too, John B.”

John B keep the smile off his face as a warm feeling filled him. “You want to go back to sleep?” he asked gently and felt JJ nod. He lowered them back down on the bed, JJ turning in his arms so that they were spooning. John B pulled him closer, resting a protective arm around him and intertwined their fingers. 

“I’m not letting him hurt you again, I promise, baby. He’s never touching you again.”

“Thank you.”

JJ didn’t think he could keep the promise, but he knew he’ll try his best. And right now, that’s enough reassurance for him to fall back into a dreamless sleep.

John B didn’t sleep at all that night. But it was okay, because JJ was safe in John B’s arms, where he belonged.


End file.
